The Problem that I always had..

I’m not talking about traffic statistics, comment volume, daily income from advertisements, but another problem that I have scarcely been talking about which is in direct relation to myself. My character and my kindness to other people. Where I try to play being the nicest guy to everyone out there. Helping everyone, even those who are not quiet close to me. I gave away domains, I gave away ECs, I helped people with their WordPress Migration but ended up with..

nothing..

Nothing special, at least. A few remain thankful and keep hanging around this boring personality after their wish has been granted, others remain invisible towards my eye but start appearing when there’s again something that they need. My classmate who is also my crush for example, doesn’t responds to any of my text messages, but once she’s out of load, she keeps texting asking for load, and once I gave her some, my phone is silent again.

Could it be that I am too kind to other people? Well, that’s what my best friend said. I should change this personality of mine, but where and how should I start with? Stop giving away freebies? Stop contests? Stop visiting other blogs? I don’t know where I am heading to with this topic but I have to express myself just like I always do. Life is very unfair with me, because how much I’m try to have an even relation to the people around me, I always draw the shortr and become toe less respected one.

It sucks to be like me, to be asked doing things that you would never want to do, ending up being left alone once they get what they want from you. It’s hard to give stuff away when you know that the people are not going to be thankful for about your kindness.

I’m stuck in a common problem again, and I don’t know if I should pursue in helping other people. Especially those whom I’m not that close with. Being friendly to strangers or not so close people isn’t bad at all, I’ve met my close friend Graxxie through means like that and I’m happy to have met her. But there are several occasions where I deeply regret the kindness I offered… what do you think?

Surely Love is Blind

I wonder how I could have been insane enough to blabber right away about someone of my liking. When I did not realize, until this very point that she’s out of her insanity. I’m not flame baiting here, nor will I start flaming at all, but it’s just undeniable that love, for a certain matter blinds the real eyes of ours which we use to see the right path.

I can’t figure how I should get along with these thousands of words on my mind right now, but let me slowly, bit by bit unfold the fury in me and get some piece of crap written down.

I won’t wonder and I won’t argue either, if there are people out there who disagree with me in the saying that Love is Blind, especially those who have a healthy sexual and emotional relationship with their respective partners, for a matter of fact, I’m also in a healthy relationship from both aspects named above right now, and I couldn’t agree more that the statement love is blind is not applicable at all times.

But it remains true for most of the time. And you cannot deny that fact. For those singles reading out there who have had their boyfriends or girlfriends before, I believe that you cannot say anything against it, while those who have found themselves in the arms of their rightly lover right now, by looking at your past, I bet you cannot say anything against it either.

Love, and a romantic relationship can never be assessed on how much you give or how much you get. Nor is it accountable to how much you love your partner or vice versa. It’s not that what matters most when engaging into a relationship, but the bond itself, the understanding of one another, of you and your lover. The respect that you show to each other and the faithfulness and loyalty of both of you.

Asking something that shouldn’t be asked yet, is never love but for certain could be labeled as lust. But since when has lust been love? Well, it’s not written in my history book or those of my friends. I can’t depict the real message that I try to carry over, but I hope you got my point somehow.

Love is blind for sure, but what blinds you isn’t always love, but the dangerous emotions thereafter. Especially girls should take care by handling these feelings sensitively, because you if you don’t, one day you end up with your legs spread and cry the next day whining, “what have I done?!”

Moment of Truth

I wish I could take writing this post that easy as singing along the song that has the same title like my post has. But it’s hard. I can’t even think about what for an hell I might go through tomorrow. I can’t even imagine what for a torment it would be if my name would not be called along with those of the others who are part of that holy, sacred, final list of graduating students. For now, I’m just a typical teenager battling through the odds of education and I can’t assure that I stand on the side of the winners, nor am I certain that I am a failure, but I admit that there have been times when I played the underdog and moments where I was on top of all things.

Though like I said, it hasn’t been always like that. Which makes me feel tensed this very moment until tomorrow when the names of the graduating students shall be commenced by our Principal. There are reasons that suggest that I should make it through, yet there has been a couple of reasons that contradict my glory to graduate, like the incident that I had with the school a few weeks ago about a post I had regarding a field trip. But that’s not the only problem that I have had.

I might be though to beat in terms of verbal English, I might kick-ass when it comes to computer education, but I have to pass the ball when it comes to Trigonometry and Filipino wherein I admit that I literally fail in those two departments. Who said that I am great at spelling? And who recalls me answering in front during our Trigonometry Class? No one does, while I have never done so in my one year stay as a fourth year high school student at my academe.

I’ve let chances pass by my, whilst I tried grabbing a few every now and then, a computer contest where I ended up as a runner up, and a group performance that has stunned the faculty account to the positive things that I have participated in. Being in a third-world section doesn’t matter really, but the performance of the student does. And I hope that what I have done was just good enough for me to move on another step forward, whilst I will start adjusting and try my best when it comes to my tertiary education in the soon future.

The moment of truth is closing in, tomorrow is the day, the day that all senior high school students at my academe have been waiting for. The list that beholds the people who have achieved enough to step on a level further in life, where realizations will be revealed for those who need improvements, and admirable words be uttered for those who succeed.  I fear that I won’t make it, I don’t want to fail for the second time around, and I do not have to. All that I can do for now is hope that I have made it, and enjoy my happiness as much as I can for now, before the soon day comes in bringing the truth, of who graduates, and who does not.

School Controversy

Head Administrator Kevin Paquet is entangled in a little problem right now in school. Not really from the educational point of view, but from a slight different one. I am not authorized to share much information about whatever problem Kevin has had encountered in school as I am only tasked to report to you, his readers of what is hindering him to blog right now.

As a spectator of all the things that have had happened to Kevin these recent twenty four hours, I believe that he is having a hard time figuring out what is right and what is wrong, whether the act that he has done a few weeks back, was good or not. What was that said incident? I may not kiss and tell anything straight regarding the issue being discussed by him and his Principal, but let me leave you a few clues to ponder upon.

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Love or not?

I am open to criticism from all sides and all perspectives, but it has been a loop sided one when I conducted a survey with my friends and my parents whether the relationship between me and her would work out. It was one sided, in a negative point of view.

I have blabbered much about this new love that I have found this new year, but is this really to be considered as love? Or yet nother trap that I am falling into. Let me share what I know and dislike from my very own opinion.

Nevermind whatever I have written above, let me instead share you some good (and as well as bad) things that have happened today on our supposed to be first day of being officially in the boyfriend-girlfriend state. [Read more]

New Years Resolution of a Teenager

So, it’s been lately too much about Entertainment, huh. But let me get off the showbiz side of things and share a post of which idea is of my own. The new year is just a couple of hours away, a new year, a new start and a new me. A new start in a sense that I will try to adopt to new ideas, to new ways of living and the new blog that I will be creating as part of my study techniques. A new me, in a sense that these new years resolution will do some change in my personality and objectives to achieve in 2009. Here are those: [Read more]

Ten Wishes This Christmas

I still crave for a lot of things even if I have received a lot already this Christmas, let me list down ten things that I want the most for this Holiday Season. To make it sound more credible and realistic, I’ll keep my hands of from those enormouswishes like “having a own house” etc, etc. But rather keep it to the small and simple ones that are still very important to me.

• See My Mother in Cebu – It has been a very long time since I last saw my mother from Cebu, and I have to admit that I really miss her through all this years of being apart.
• See Kirae – I had the chance to meet my “younger sister” Kirae in Manila, when I attended the WordCamp Philippines 2008, but unfortunately, our communication was gone during my two day stay in the metro.

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